Archive for December, 2006

Teka part 2

Sunday, December 10th, 2006

Gusto ko sanang maging dentist paglaki ko.

O ayan… Ayoko na nang pinag-uusapan ang past at present. Naniniwala akong mas mpait ang present kesa sa past at future. Yun lang yung akin. Kaso di pa rin maalis s isipan ko yung past. Well, kung ayaw talaga at walang magagawa, isama nalang sa mga lakad mo. Painumin mo. Pasahan mo ng baso at chaser para matuwa naman sayo. Bayaran mo na rin ng pamsahe, 6 lang kasi estudyante rin. Magtabi na in kayo sa kma para masaya. Tas ayain mong tumambay sa field. Un. It’s just a way of saying thanks fo everything. Cguro kung wla lang talagang dumating na ganun sa buhy ko, cguro hindi ako natatauhan sa mga pgkkamali ko. I’ll not be the Dre you used to know. Iba ako siguro. Oh well, salmt.. Yaan mo, seryoso ako sa "sagot-ko-pmsahe-mo program".

Sa future, gusto ko ng isang successful n buhay. Isang magandang asawa… (DEMaNDING BA?), at mass count of children. Gusto ko lhat panganay… Haha. Joke…

For the last time, napagisip-isip kong last entry ko na to para sa present ko… Peo I can sense na hinding hindi ko maiiwasan un. So I can’t promise. Try lang.

Gusto ko may sense ng kahit no ang buhay ko. Kahit man lang makapag-plant ako ng tree bago ako mamatay. O kahit makapagsult ko ng libro. O makapag-father ako ng super duper n mga tadpoles… o kaya a biiiiig pawadise of tutule. Hehe. o pwede din tutubi…

Kahit man lang nabigyan ko kayo ng matatamis kong yakap, halik, at ngiti. Un. but I’m not ready to die yet. Marami pa akong luhang dpat iiyak, gagaguhing prof, liligawan habmbuhay, at marami pang anak na palalakihin. Hehe. Sino ba naman ang ready mamatay ngayon? As in ngayon na? Itaas ang paa? Basta.

San ka ba makakatagpo ng kaligayahan? Yung tipong panghabmbuhay ang dating? Well, natanong lang.

Nasbi ko na to dati e… "Alam mo ba, para sa akin, kahit maya’t maya gusto ko ng pakiramdm na galit at di-mapkali." Yung tipong may iniisip palagi. Peo hindi galit sa mundo. At dapt wlang kahit anong epektong msama sayo. Wag naman lagi. Parang khit ppaano, ung bitterness dumidikit sayo. Para kahit papaano may pagkakamali ka. Meron parating room for improvement sa buhay. Kelangan natin ng problema para makita natin kung ano pa yung kulang, yung dapat baguhin at yung dapat galingan pa. Andun pa rin yung desire for perfection…

Ayoko pang mag-paalam. Mmi pa akong gustong sabihin. Marami na in akong hindi nasasabi sa mga kebigan ko. Nagkakasala na ako. Hehe. Magkakaalamn din. Basta.

Minsan naisip kong bumalik sa linya. yung tipong bumalik sa pagpapari. Kahit Philo Major ako e may "calling" pa akong naaramdaman. Naka-silent p kasi ako e. Ayoko pang ilipat sa "loud" o "discreet". Lord, wg niyo muna ako guluhin pede ba? Hehe. Joke. Mahirap magsalita ng patapos. Feeling ko sa buhay ko, pang chapter 56 pa lng ako e. Marami pang chapters akong dapat i-fill. Marami pang kalabaw ang dapat isilang. Marami pang criminal ang dapat huliin.

Hanggang dito nalang siguro… Blanko na utak ko eh…

Mabuhay pa rin si Kim Chiu… at siyempre ako… at ikaw…

"Mahaba pa ang buhay.. Kung mamatay ka ngayon, malas mo"

                                                                   -dre.

Teka part1.

Thursday, December 7th, 2006

Ui,

Ngaun lang ako talaga magpapatama sa blog… Ang magtanong na kaklase ko tungkol dito, naku, ewan ko lang.

Wala lang. Feel lang talaga magbanta.

What does it take to be a superfriend?

Sa akin kasi parang patas lang ang pagiging mag M.u.(Mag-un) at ang pagiging committed. Parehong masaya siguro ang feeling. Ganun na rin yon. Ang pagkakaiba lang talaga siguro nito eh, ung pagiging official co-better half ng isa’t isa. Parang 1cm. lang ang agwat ng M.u at isang official relationship e. Parang assurance lang na you are giving a part of you not because of something ordinary. You are giving a big part of yourself to that person you know who would handle that part of you. Ang M.u. kasi parang "kayo" pero hindi talaga yung literal na "kayo". At andun na rin yung expectations na magiging kayo… someday… somehow.

How does it hurt when it ends?

Of course masakit kahit hindi naging kayo tapos tinapos na. Parang pareho lang. Tingin ko mas exciting pa ang superfriendship kesa sa isang official relationship e. Correct me if I’m wrong pero, sa M.u kasi, you get to discover new things everyday. Well, you might say na mas sobra ang isang official relationship. Sa akin lang kasi, sa M.u, palagi kang nanghuhula, palagi ka nalang magtatanong. Alam mong meron nang bagay sa pagitan ninyo pero pwede pa itong mabago kahit kelan. Walang pinipiling oras… walang pinipiling lugar. At hindi mo na alam nagkukulang ka na pala.

Sa isang relationship naman, nandoon na yung trust at assurance ninyo. Wala nang dapat i-discover na talagang magpapasaya sau. You discover things naman e, pero hndi katulad ng sa M.u. Ang kelangan mo nalang na gawin e ang pantilihing healthy ang relationship ninyo and make the bonds stronger.

Uso na ito. Daw. Uso na daw itong M.u M.u na hindi kau pero masaya kau. Yun ang sabi nila.

Nasaktan lang talaga ako siguro kaya ako nagkakaganito. Haven’t heard of the other side yet. Yung matinong version. Di ko rin alam kung nasaktan din siya sa ginawa nia. Sinabi naman na nasaktan din. But that’s not enough. Pilit ko mang ayusin talaga, walang matinong version ang naisasagot sa akin. Siyempre to make things straight, kamustahan muna. Tapos maganda na rin yung biglain mo sa medyo dulo na habang medyo nagkakailangan na kau. Yung tipong nagkukuwentuhan kau tungkol sa buhay tapos biglain mo nang, "anu talaga nangyari sa atin?… kwento mo nga…".

Honestly, yung mga masasamang bagay na pede mong isipin at paghinalaan kung bakit nagkaganoon, inicp ko. Walang nakapagpigil sa akin na hindi isipin na "kaya mo ‘yan". Talagang dito lang lumawak ang isip ko at napaisip talaga nang husto… Dito lang ako nalungkot talaga. Dito rin napatunayan na sa umpisa parang wala lang, nagtatapangtapangan, pero pag tumagal… ganun.

Hanggang ngayon e naguguluhan pa rin. Plastic ako pag sabihin kong ok na ako. Pero hindi pa naman ako suicidal. Talagang walang matinong version sa mga pagkakaintindi ko. Mahahaba-habang inuman to… eshte… pag-uusap ‘to.

Hindi naman sa binabalik ko kung ano man ang naging tinginan noon. Gusto ko lang talaga maibalik kung ano yung naging pagsasama at turingan talaga. Miss ko lang talaga yun… Tanungin moko kung anu kulang sakin, sagutin kita ng "siya… at iPod." Un…

Di ko sasabihin kung sino nagkulang… Teka, sino ba?

SA’Yo:

Usap muna tayo. Ung matino… Gusto kong maliwanagan ang lahat.

I’ll admit na meron paring konting intentions of bringing back the times. Pero I’m just beginning to forget about it. You should forget it by now.

Well, kung tau nga, tau talaga di ba… Pero tulad ng sabi mo…"bata pa tayo… marami pa mangyayari sa buhay natin." I’ll just stick my nose on everything you said.

Sa inyo:

May mali ba sa sinabi ko? Hayaan na ang typo error. yung sa mga sinabi ko lang. Pls. correct me… Naiiyak ako.. Sa totoo lang… Sabihin niyo nang madrama… Be vocal… Comments…

Geh bye…

4th Year Damn Articles

Friday, December 1st, 2006

Mga articles ko nung 4th year H.S. (cnxa na kung wrong grammar. d ko pa nbasa to, pinost ko lang pero ako may gawa nya… cnxa na rin kung english… marami pa to.. abangan…)

Andre Vincent G. Lagoy                                                                             September 1,2005

SPEECH IV                                                                                                     Article No. 10

3 Days… 72 Hours… 4,320 Minutes… 259,200 Seconds…

            We all know that 3 days is not sufficient for us to have fun or do a mandatory job or task if it is that hard to do. Three days isn’t enough for us to master Latin grammar. Three days isn’t enough for you to persuade your babes to say “yes”. And three days will never be enough and it doesn’t end there. If I had three days to live, I would live my life the fullest. It may be or may be not impossible to live your life the fullest but you can. Some say we can but we may not live our life the fullest in the span of three days. Some common answers you would hear if you throw this question to others would be: he would take his confession, he would stay with his family, and he would apologize to the person he had fought with, or pay back the time you didn’t give your dog. These are just possible answers you would hear from different people.

            On the first day, I’d start my tasks earlier than my usual rising. Three o’clock would be a good time to rise. In moments like this, you would surely feel depression. You may want to cry but you don’t want. You start to look at the clock and listen absent-mindedly to the ticking sounds as you recall your happiest moments. As I said, I would rise up at three; I would call up my friends and invite them for a slumber party in my house tonight. If it seems too early to call out a slumber party, they would know if I die after 72 hours. After hearing them nag about me calling a slumber party in the wee hours of the night, I get then my favorite movie and stick it onto my DVD player. Watching Titanic in these times is a good idea. I could spend my four hours watching two adults show intimacy with each other and a real pretty ship sink amidst people in life jackets and safety boats.

            The movie will maybe finished at ten in the morning if I slept during the movie, and it might have bee finished at eight if ever I savored the movie’s scenes. Let’s say I didn’t sleep. After fixing things in their proper places, I would go out the house and bike around the city. You will again feel intimidated because you will get to see your last glimpse of the city and it’s every corner you grew up into. During your biking, you would likely see early people who work for a living. You would miss them. The smell of the freshly baked pan de sal you often bought during the late afternoons, you would smell it your last. You will be able to meet your crush on the street and that would be your last “Hi!” to her and her response is all that you will bring in the after life.

            Afternoon comes and you’ve finished your lunch. Switching on the TV, you saw your favorite variety show. You will feel depressed again because this might be the last time you would watch your favorite variety show, and it may be your last laugh. After three hours, 4 o’clock in the afternoon comes. You would prepare for the slumber party you called out in the middle of your friends’ deep sleep. You would prepare it nicely. Serving it the way they won’t forget you is a nice thing to do. Cooking the food yourself would be a better idea. When they come, they don’t have any idea it would be your despedida party. After singing, you eat, and then sing, then you eat again and you somehow open the topic of the “old days”. Still, nobody had the idea of you leaving him or her, for good. Reminiscing would be the worst part of the party but it could help you overcome your depression over the concept of leaving the world in 4,320 minutes.

            After countless hits and misses in your life, everybody finally goes home. You clean the mess up and you would think that this night wasn’t really that bad at all. You are now exhausted from that memorable night. You have something to take in as memory after life. Sitting down the sofa is a good idea. You stare at the TV and you will suddenly feel deep exhaustion. Mr. Sandman puts on the sleeping dust onto your eyes and you feel sleepy. But realizing death again, you grabbed the nearby alarm clock and turned it to alarm at four o’clock. After feeling sleepy for minutes, you finally dose off. Your mind flies in different directions. Memories start to go back where it began. Times like your first shot in a basketball game, your first written sentence, your first crush, your first pet, and the first site you’ve opened in the Internet. Suddenly, the alarm clock starts to ring it’s insulting and monotonous alarm. You see it’s exactly four in the morning.

            Feeling the stress, you feel being pitied again and again and again. What should you do next? You spend your time with…yourself. Why don’t you go to the mall and buy things with lifespan of 2,520 minutes. And suddenly you see yourself riding a jeep going to the nearby mall. Everybody was happy. No one was aware that you are going to die in 2 days. After minutes of thinking nobody knew you were going to die, you see yourself looking at a nearby branded sports shop. You look at the nice shoes and accessories you will miss. Then you go to a nice spot where people buy clothes and some garments. All things are branded and never forget that you too are branded. We are made and distributed by God™. You buy things you fancy most. Most of the things you bought were food. After being full of seeing what this nice world could offer, you then go to out of it before you let out crazy tears of depression. You would ask God why you got to go in the last 155,520 seconds.

            The sun is almost set and still you aren’t ready to meet face to face with your maker. You set off to your home. Your home is where you had lived your life the most. This is the place where you had almost all your “firsts”. At seven in the evening, you get on beside the telephone ready to call whom you would like to call. Eating the food you bought, you lift up the handset and started dialing the number of the most special person to you. The person though not your own blood, had always filled you with lots of joy, miseries, and advices in how to live the life as a normal life. You didn’t tell the person about the new news about your life. The best move you could make. After hours of talking, and after saying special words, you say the last goodbye to each other. You would cherish the day that special person said goodnight. You set the alarm clock again at five in the morning. The last day would be the last 24 hours. This day should really be special…

            The following day, you will see yourself kneeling before the priest. Like I said on top, one of the commonest answers of living your life in three days is going to confession. Do you always wonder why the priest is so lenient to you and your often-committed sins? After your devout penance, you will be with your faithful family. The last 15 hours is maybe the crucial part before dying. It’s either you would perspire a bucket of sweat or faint in the middle of nowhere and awaking with devils by your side. How could death convicts feel about dying in a designated time? You know you would die, and you might feel uneasy or uncomfortable because you’re leaving. It’s too late making a last will and testament and you don’t even have something to pass to. Well, you might pass your T-shirts to your younger siblings. Eight hours have gone and you will have to meet God. Now, you must be preparing a speech of how you could describe your lawful stay here on earth. Seven…six…five… and four hours to go and you would be seeing a tunnel with a blinding light in the end of it.

            Three…two… and there comes your final torpor. One hour and you would be traveling from your body to another place. Sixty minutes more and you would be meeting God face to face. You go there on your deathbed. Lay down as if it’s an ordinary thing to do. You will see how special you are to your loved ones… I will lay down there in my deathbed as if nothing will happen. Though I’ve never spent the quality time here on earth and never enjoyed the fun in life, God has called me to be at His side. There is nothing I can do. Ten seconds left and I feel numbness. I think I’ve done my work here. Sorry to everybody. Thanks for everything. God bless all those who have befriended me along the way. Forgive them for they don’t know what they’re doing…

            I think I’ve spent all things necessary. Three days have passed and I think what I’ve done is the fullest, man. I’ve spent my time with my priorities: my friends, who played a special role in my life; God, who was always there to guide me; my family, who had tireless efforts of making me what I am today. We all know that three isn’t as many as a million but it can be like a million if you’d make the day your fullest. Doing things unnecessary makes life not worth living. Doing wrong things makes you living unworthy. Thank God for He gave you a life you might live the fullest. We have every opportunity to make it better and even make it the best. If you have three days to live, what would you do?